They're all so good.

1. Hangovers!
-Nothing a few cocktails can't fix!

2. Black-Outs!
-Not just for the power company anymore!

3. Naughty Liver!
-You must be punished!

4. Beer!
-Hey, it's cheaper than therapy!

5. Tequila!
-For fast relief of conciousness!

6. Breasts!
-Helping men avoid eye contact since 1865!

7. Jello Shots!
-Your OTHER favourite thing that jiggles!

8. Rehab?
-Momma didn't raise no quitter!

9. Drinking!
-Hey, every village needs an idiot!

10. Twins!
-Hey, every man needs a goal in life!

11. Excercise!
-No gut! No glory!

12. Working?
-Sure, as long as it doesn't cut into my drinking time!

13. Sex!
-Finally a job we can do laying down!